Kickstarter
by Ghost320
Summary: Noticing his pals without lovers, Valon decides to set Alister and Raphael up on various dates with many different people. Mai's just hoping that she won't have to send out apology letters.


**Title: **Kickstarter

**Summary: **Noticing his pals without lovers, Valon decides to set Alister and Raphael up on various dates with many different people. Mai's just hoping she won't have to send out apology letters.

**Rating: **T. Probably should be M due to the language, but I don't think "the f-word" is emotionally scarring.

**A/N: **Constructive criticism is really appreciated, so if you'd like to give me feedback on how I'm writing the characters I'd be thankful.

****Please Note: Yes, I am typing out Valon's dialogue. If I didn't, 'and had him speak as eloquently and robotically as I am typing out right now', would _not _suit him at all. So, misspellings in Valon's dialogue, are not really misspellings. I assume most of you'd catch on but, just throwing this out there in case we get that one grammar nazi who tries to tell me that it's "Alister" and not "Alistah".**

* * *

Ch 1:

Prologue

Valon was on a happy streak.

Ever since he and Mai had _officially _gotten together ー an extreme challenge on Valon's part ー he's been seemingly unstoppable. Nothing has upset, or otherwise rained on Valon's parade. Not even the little kids, who touch his parked motorcycle with their greasy, sticky hands were able to get a rise out of him.

Lately however, Valon finds himself pitying others. Two of his friends and fellow bikers, to be specific. When he's with Mai in their presence they seem indifferent, sure, but how could they be feeling on the inside? Does it remind them of their own loneliness? Valon wondered whether if it was his business or not, coming to a positive conclusion.

Hell fucking yes it was his business.

He and Mai were out for a ride on their motorcycles and had parked to eat lunch. The place was almost in the middle of nowhere, quiet and relaxing. Numerous people would go to enjoy good food and terrible service. They sat at an outdoor table and ate their food, with Mai sighing at all of Valon's arguments on the subject of his friends' love lives.

"Ah'm gonna set 'ese two up with people, cross mah heart, goddamnit!"

"Valon, _please_," "Is the melodrama really necessary? You've been going at It for a half an hour," her voice was risen, but she didn't shout.

"Love, look. You know how happy we ah, right? Lately Ah just been lookin' at 'Lister'n'Raf', an' Ah just don't know how they do it."

"Do what, stay single? It's not that hard, and certainly easier. And, less expensive."

"PFFF! You're tellin' me!" At that, the pair laughed. This was just one aspect of their relationship ー Valon would say something outrageous, Mai would object but crack up, and each would burst into fits of laughter. These times are only partial reminders of why they love eachother so much. In the end, they kept eachother sane.

Mai composed herself and picked up where she left off. "But seriously," she waited for Valon. He nodded, signifying he'd had his laughs. "You shouldn't meddle with _those _two and love. They're big boys, if they want to die virgins, _let_ them.

"Awww, c'mon Mai, they may luk big, but they's jus' a coupl'a big awkward babies," a sip of his drink was needed before Valon continued. "Raf'f be a softy. He ain't naïve, he's 'zactly the opposite. He's too wary to get close to anybody and'd never go on a quick date wid someone on 'is ownー"

"Which is _exactly _why it'd be pointless to try setting him up," Mai interrupted.

Valon continued. "'An a li'l push neva hurt anyone. With Alistah, well he's not too different from 'Af. Thing is, Raf would be as polite an' nice as possible to his date, while Al..." Valon shuddered. "See, it's not lak he _means _to be a sarcastic prick, but sometimes, he just _is_ a sarcastic prick. 'E'd accidentally upset a girl an' not know it 'til she cries, 'en e'd feel bad about it later," he leaned back, sighing. "Ah dunno, Mai. Ah just want'em to be happy, you know that."

Mai nodded and placed her hand on his. "I know you only mean well, hon. But you can't force them to fall in love. As far as you've told me, they don't even make an effort to get that close to people."

"But Ah'm not tryin'a make'em fall in love, Mai!" Valon shot up and gesticulated his excitement. "It's exactly what ya said! They can't come close to anybody, 'cause they don't _meet _anybody. They won't fall in love, Ah just wanna...broaden their horizons, is all!"

Mai raised a brow and scoffed. "Uh-huh. And how do you go about doing that?"

Her beloved brunette smirked and slammed his hands down on the table. "Why, speed datin', a'course!"

Temporarily stunned, Valon left her speechless. "I don't even want to know how you're going to manage that."

"Ya mean how _we_ gonna manage that."

"I'm listening," Mai swirled around the straw of her drink as Valon began to explain his dastardly plan.

The plan was to go to the bikers' favourite pub and request to host a small speed dating service. Valon was sure he'd be given permission, since they were all regulars and the owner had owed him a favour. Then, he and Mai would advertise it in various different ways within the area. He would invite the two at the same time ー as it was rare that both Alister and Rafael would be there together ー and force them to join the speed dating with various other people. Doing this would mean having to worry about random pairs that didn't concern his buddies, but they'd be rotated throughout the night so it didn't matter. The more the merrier, and the more ladies to choose from. After explaining all of this to his lover, Valon glowed with pride. "ー Pretty damn good, Ahm Ah r'oight?"

Mai merely blinked. She had to admit, he _did _have some good points as to why they should even bother finding dates for Rafael and Alister, and it actually sounded like Valon put some serious effort into coming up with this... "I'm in," she finally said. Before Valon got too carried away, she added, "_But. _If things get too out of hand, I want the event to end right away."

"Eh? Outta hand? Oh _mah_ watch? Love..." Valon went around the small table and nuzzled her neck. "Would Ah let you down?"

She smiled. _"It's only dating, nothing too chaotic will happen. Let's just hope they don't get too angry at us."_

* * *

**Thus concludes the prologue. In a perfect world this would be a oneshot, but, I'm lazy and too eager for that shit. I had this idea a while ago but couldn't write. I was working on the second chapter for my Tea/Dartz fic but I'm way too giddy to write that for now. **

**Read this: The various people that Alister and Rafael go on dates on? Those will be characters from VARIOUS different things. I'm talkin animes, video games, other works of fiction... You name it. EVENTUALLY I might allow people to submit OCs, but for now, feel free to request an already exisitng character. From anything. If I'm familiar with the character then there's a chance I'll write them in. But if it's from, for example, things I'm not familiar with, en I won't write them since in accuracy bothers me.**

**Other than that I'll just write whoever the hell I want into these. It's more of a joke than anything serious so, yeah I hope you find it entertaining. Next chapter will be sort of a... Prologue part 2 mixed with their first dates, just to see how i want to execute this. Alister's side and Rafael's sides will probably switch back and forth throughout the chapter. **

**If you recognize any of the characters i use, you might enjoy it more. If not, then it probably won't be as good to you, if it was good at all anyways. I'll keep the first few chapters pretty general but I will eventually delve into silly territory. **


End file.
